First and foremost, if you are reading this I’d like to congratulate you for making it through the previous year and entering this new year.
It seems to me that last year was one heck of a year for a lot of people. But if you are reading this blog today, then it can only be concluded that somehow you have managed to surpass all the bullshit that was thrown at you the previous year and you are alive in the mist of a brand new year. But, if you’re anything like me, the bullshit has followed you into this new year and there seems to be no sight of change in this upcoming year.
Now, I can sit here and write you a blog post that’s full of “life hacks” to keep yourself focused, prepared, and aware for this new year, but I’m not. Lol
The truth is, as unfortunate as it may sound, things will probably get worse and there isn’t a”hack” or panic button you can press that could rid you from facing hardship this year. But that doesn’t necessarily have to be devastating news and I hope this doesn’t come to you as a surprise. The beauty that lies within life’s hardest endeavors is the reconnection you have to yourself during the process.
It’s quite miraculous. You see, we unconsciously disconnect from ourselves as we get wrapped up in the everyday routine. We become very focused with attending to our jobs; whether it be working in school, our professions, or even in our social life. We log out from our intuition and log in to the structured, scrutinizing world that we live in.
Last year, I watched as someone very near and dear to me endure one of the hardest years of their life. And as I sat beside them, mentally fatigued and narrowed eyed they said faithfully,
You don’t realize what really matters to you in life until you’re stripped down to your basic necessities and your force to sit alone to reflect and understand what life’s trying to teach you.
At that very moment I didn’t understand the meaning behind what this person was saying, but I kept it in the back of mind…
In late spring of last year, I took a semester off from school to focus on working full time in order to save money to pay off my tuition cost at school. During this time, my dear grandmother became very ill after having a triple bypass surgery earlier that same year.
This was the second year that my grandmother’s health had relapse after under going a drastic surgery and the devastation of losing her was taking a hard toll in my mental health. To add onto the situation, I was over working myself at my job and I wasn’t making enough money to pay off my debts, all to have ended up pushed away from the main drive that kept me motivated, my education.
But I decided to take a leap of faith in myself after taking note that I wasn’t in good place both mentally and physically, so I decided to quit my job. And there I was left, no job, no education, and no drive to give me a fulfillment of purpose.
I recall crying to my mother because of how pathetic I felt, nothing seemed to be going the way I planned and every time I tried to pick myself up, something else would occur to set me back some more. She kindly told me to not to fixate so much on time, that soon my time would come.
But her words seemed empty to me, especially since I felt so stripped away from everything that I once had. And that’s when I remembered…
I had realized at that moment that I was taking a lot for granted. As redundant as this line may be,”things could have been worse”. It’s not to say that I wasn’t struggling, but I had a lot to be very thankful for and I also had a lot of refocusing to work on.
My mother was right, my time would come eventually, but for that time being I had to take the “negatives” that I faced and reinstate them as progress.
I knew that all I wanted was to spend time with my grandmother and to make sure that she understood the unconditional love I had for her. I also wanted to keep her faith high that her life would get better. But in order to do so, I too had to believe that within myself. I had to revaluate the way I saw life and reconsider all the blessings I had, especially during times that life got really hard. And in moments when I felt my most vulnerable, I had to tell myself, it’s okay to ask for help.
I spent my free time surrounded by family and close friends, reading and writing a lot of self reflections. This all was part of the process;the process to positive reinforcement into the new life I wanted for myself. And I still continue to follow these steps.
This isn’t a “life hack” to a better year but it’s a reminder that not every struggle in life has to be a setback. It’s very important that if you do want to have a better outlook on life this year, that you take the time to take your health and blessing into heavy consideration. We live in a dark world, but that doesn’t mean you must walk in the darkness. If you have people to lean on, lean on them when you need the support. And if you don’t, grab a pen or a pencil, some paper, and just write it out. Sometimes your own self reflections will be the savior to your distress. Your main focus overall should always be to carry a positive outlook, even when all seems to fail. It’s easier said than done, but I can say this wholeheartedly because I’ve lived through it and I know that I will continue to.
Stick to what you have for now, appreciate it, and slowly work your way out of whatever situation you’re stuck in. You will have more than just a better year, but a better life.